Neighbour's tales
Was out for Teh & kopi session with bro Azman last night , when we chatted on his bike trips to Malaysia.. I juz thought I might share some of his funny stories and share some of his experiences & the experiences of a Malay Singaporean Cab Driver who sent me home the other day ...
~~~Experiences & Opinions below are purely personal , Although I personally think it may represent a mere fraction of what my fellow Singaporeans are enCountering~~~
The Singaporean Malay Cab Driver's Story-
he sent me home last friday night , told me about his biking adventures with his Singaporean Chinese & Singaporean Malay friends.
Once , they went riding up to JB for Good Seafood & some nice shopping.. Went in a big group of big bikes ... parked it by the roads where they could see their bikes , before proceeding to a restaurant to eat.
Not long after , one of them spotted 3 suspicious characters hanging around their bikes and were squatting down as if repairing THEIR BIKE. Immediately the cabby & 2 of his friends went over directly while the rest of his chinese & malay friends Flanked them and went up to the 3 jokers from behind.
Cabby's friend Spoke in Malay : " Brother , whats wrong? your bike spoilt ah?
The Suspicious character #1 : Erm , Ya lah , Cannot start MY Bike leh ...
Cabby's friend : Cannot Start YOUR bike ?? Come Come , let me help you ! ( He then proceed to take out his Bike Key to ignite the engine .
The Suspicious character #1 , #2, #3 's Balls all drop ...
Summary : The Cabby & Co. gave them a Jia lat Jia Lat lesson in Pain .. after scolding them for spoiling JB as a nice destination , for making JB a scary place for Singaporeans to come .. when Singaporeans come over to contribute to their economy.
Bro Azman 's stories -
Story 1 --- They went riding up north towards Kuala Lumpur in a big bike envoy , bro Az & his friend got stopped by 2 roadblocks in 1 single day ! 1st roadblock , he and his friend were "caught speeding" . Alamak , his friend didnt bring along his riding licence. ( what an idiot ) .
Azman spoke to the "Traffic Polis" ( i dun wanna mix their "traffic Polis" with our Traffic Police ) , asked him to let them off , settle "on the spot"... The traffic Polis said , ok ... settle on the spot , RM$200 . Bro Az tried to bargain to RM$100 .. but the Traffic Polis said that the COMPOUND FINE for the bike to be Released was RM$1200 ...
It was later bargained down to RM$150 . But the worse was yet to come .... They resumed travelling up north again ... and Not long after ... They were stopped for SPEEDING AGAIN.
Traffic Polis to Both of them : You two kena caught speeding @ 149 km/h. Fine RM$300.
Bro Azman : Ok Ok .. give me the summons ...
Surprised Traffic Polis : RM$300 leh ..You sure? You sure ah ? ( He seemed to be waiting for an offer from Azman to counter Offer him a "fine" to settle on the spot .)
Bro Azman Fedup after 1st roadblock : Yes ! give me the summon , I settle @ JB's police station
Traffic Polis : You Sure ? Hesitates ... You settle before ( @ police station ) ah? ..hesitates again .. asks his colleague " This Two speeding HOW FAST?"
Summary : Bro Azman Got his "speeding" summons after many mins of DillyDallying , he never paid the Bribe nor the fine... never got inTo trouble for the summons too ... sounded like a dummy summon...
Story#2
** There is advice from his Old-timer Biker friends who advised that when faced with a Malaysian Traffic Police RoadBlock , Juz simply say : " Member, Member" ( of dunno whatever corrupt club) , Stuff RM$20 into their hands and ride oFF ... ( Unproven method ... TRY @ OWN RISK ) **
Story #3
Azman & Yongquan had Fireblades then ... Went JB together to relac ... parked their bikes @ basement of ashopping centre ... only to find the Sparkplugs of their fireblades stolen. They Phui Chao Nua as they had to push the 2 bikes up from basement to ground level , One @ a time. Fireblade bikes are heavy ...
Well ... with all these little stories and no picture ... how can ??
** Please note that this video is controversial as there are doubts abt the authencity of this video clip ... The subtitles are also Not very accurate ... My malay friend says the cop actually said to the guy , to pass the money UNDERNEATH his license , So that others wun see ... The Subtitles also said the chinese guy said he is a Communication Consultant ..whereby in fact he sells handphones , as he said in the video . So Juz watch & laugh. When u kena the real thing ... react accordingly !
~~~Experiences & Opinions below are purely personal , Although I personally think it may represent a mere fraction of what my fellow Singaporeans are enCountering~~~
The Singaporean Malay Cab Driver's Story-
he sent me home last friday night , told me about his biking adventures with his Singaporean Chinese & Singaporean Malay friends.
Once , they went riding up to JB for Good Seafood & some nice shopping.. Went in a big group of big bikes ... parked it by the roads where they could see their bikes , before proceeding to a restaurant to eat.
Not long after , one of them spotted 3 suspicious characters hanging around their bikes and were squatting down as if repairing THEIR BIKE. Immediately the cabby & 2 of his friends went over directly while the rest of his chinese & malay friends Flanked them and went up to the 3 jokers from behind.
Cabby's friend Spoke in Malay : " Brother , whats wrong? your bike spoilt ah?
The Suspicious character #1 : Erm , Ya lah , Cannot start MY Bike leh ...
Cabby's friend : Cannot Start YOUR bike ?? Come Come , let me help you ! ( He then proceed to take out his Bike Key to ignite the engine .
The Suspicious character #1 , #2, #3 's Balls all drop ...
Summary : The Cabby & Co. gave them a Jia lat Jia Lat lesson in Pain .. after scolding them for spoiling JB as a nice destination , for making JB a scary place for Singaporeans to come .. when Singaporeans come over to contribute to their economy.
Bro Azman 's stories -
Story 1 --- They went riding up north towards Kuala Lumpur in a big bike envoy , bro Az & his friend got stopped by 2 roadblocks in 1 single day ! 1st roadblock , he and his friend were "caught speeding" . Alamak , his friend didnt bring along his riding licence. ( what an idiot ) .
Azman spoke to the "Traffic Polis" ( i dun wanna mix their "traffic Polis" with our Traffic Police ) , asked him to let them off , settle "on the spot"... The traffic Polis said , ok ... settle on the spot , RM$200 . Bro Az tried to bargain to RM$100 .. but the Traffic Polis said that the COMPOUND FINE for the bike to be Released was RM$1200 ...
It was later bargained down to RM$150 . But the worse was yet to come .... They resumed travelling up north again ... and Not long after ... They were stopped for SPEEDING AGAIN.
Traffic Polis to Both of them : You two kena caught speeding @ 149 km/h. Fine RM$300.
Bro Azman : Ok Ok .. give me the summons ...
Surprised Traffic Polis : RM$300 leh ..You sure? You sure ah ? ( He seemed to be waiting for an offer from Azman to counter Offer him a "fine" to settle on the spot .)
Bro Azman Fedup after 1st roadblock : Yes ! give me the summon , I settle @ JB's police station
Traffic Polis : You Sure ? Hesitates ... You settle before ( @ police station ) ah? ..hesitates again .. asks his colleague " This Two speeding HOW FAST?"
Summary : Bro Azman Got his "speeding" summons after many mins of DillyDallying , he never paid the Bribe nor the fine... never got inTo trouble for the summons too ... sounded like a dummy summon...
Story#2
** There is advice from his Old-timer Biker friends who advised that when faced with a Malaysian Traffic Police RoadBlock , Juz simply say : " Member, Member" ( of dunno whatever corrupt club) , Stuff RM$20 into their hands and ride oFF ... ( Unproven method ... TRY @ OWN RISK ) **
Story #3
Azman & Yongquan had Fireblades then ... Went JB together to relac ... parked their bikes @ basement of ashopping centre ... only to find the Sparkplugs of their fireblades stolen. They Phui Chao Nua as they had to push the 2 bikes up from basement to ground level , One @ a time. Fireblade bikes are heavy ...
Well ... with all these little stories and no picture ... how can ??
** Please note that this video is controversial as there are doubts abt the authencity of this video clip ... The subtitles are also Not very accurate ... My malay friend says the cop actually said to the guy , to pass the money UNDERNEATH his license , So that others wun see ... The Subtitles also said the chinese guy said he is a Communication Consultant ..whereby in fact he sells handphones , as he said in the video . So Juz watch & laugh. When u kena the real thing ... react accordingly !
posted by Mambo XMG at Tuesday, October 10, 2006
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home